Relationships...ohhhh boy...

Let's face it, a sad but true fact in this world is that every relationship, unless resulting in marriage...will end. That's a difficult fact for most people to grasp, but we've all been there. Breakups happen every day, some people get back together, some don't. Sometimes it's a mutual feeling, sometimes it's not. Sometimes we're the ones who want it to end, sometimes we're not. And sometimes, neither person wants it to, it's just by virtue of circumstances or the situation at hand.

It is possible for 2 perfect people to find each other, and yet not be perfect FOR each other. Every individual has a different path, different goals, different views on situations, and those are not always compatible with a specific person as you may have been hoping for. I never understood this concept until recently. If someone is so great, why not give up everything to be with them? Sometimes it's not that cut and dry...and sometimes it's just as difficult to understand ourselves as it is for the other person to understand us.

This is difficult, because the natural defense for this kind of mindset would be "well, if it's gonna end, then why bother starting in the first place?" My answer is this: each person we come across in the course of our lives, will leave a mark on us...if we allow it. They will help us grow, teach us new things, show us different views on the world, etc. These situations are valuable to personal growth. Sometimes two people grow together, and sometimes apart, but it's important to remember that both people are in fact, growing.

I also believe a relationship is priority for many people. They are not comfortable being single and want to feel the comfort of having someone there. My thoughts are, in order to be effective in a relationship for both your sake and the other person's, you must be comfortable enough and established enough in your life to give ample attention to said relationship. This doesn't necessarily mean being a college grad with your career in place, I mean more along the lines of not being so scatterbrained trying to figure out who you are and what you want, that it takes attention away from the other person. Attention that they deserve. If both people are not ready for this commitment, the relationship will likely not unfold as one or both had hoped for. This is not the fault of either person, simply a case of unfortunate circumstances, which must be understood by all parties involved.

My hope for everyone...is that at one point or another, we are each put in a position where we are on both the giving and receiving end of a breakup. This is not for the purpose of wishing hurt and heartbreak on anyone, it is for the purpose of gaining an understanding for the fact that NEITHER end is ever easy, and there is a unique difficulty to each. The hope is that while one person may not understand exactly how the other is feeling, the empathy will still be there to be able to relate, and know that neither party is necessarily happy with the outcome, everyone has their reasons.

Speaking of reasons, everything happens for a reason...sometimes things fall apart so better things can fall together. And sometimes, it's simply the timing that isn't right. Everything always works out in the end...and if it's not working out, it's not the end! So keep your hopes alive, keep moving forward, and NEVER let a past situation govern your outlook on the future, because everything and everyone is different. If two people are meant to be, they will be. Maybe not today, maybe not next week, but whenever the universe intends for it to happen.

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

INERTIA

in·er·tia definition Pronunciation: /in-ˈər-shə, -shē-ə/ Function: n 1 a : a property of matter by which it remains at rest or in uniform motion in the same straight line unless acted upon by some external force

We all know the basic definition of intertia from high school science class - something will keep doing exactly what it's doing unless a stronger outside force acts upon it to change its direction. Here's the catch though - it's the same for people's lives as well.

We see it every day (or even experience it), people going back and forth to (for example) work every day, an hour in traffic in the morning, 8 hours in the office, hour drive back, and what is there to do after that? sit in front of the tv and BAKE your brain because you're so exhausted from your day...just to get up and do it again in the morning. People are losing their sense of accomplishment, purpose, and most of all PROGRESS. This is INERTIA acting on us as individuals, we simply continue on the same path unless something CHANGES.

I'm not saying to all of a sudden quit your job and go on some aimless adventure, but small, measurable steps in a different direction are always a good start. And of course not everyone is a victim of these circumstances, but many are. Something as simple as a little hobby or a side business may be able to get you out of the trenches and into the action again. Without a defined sense of purpose or clear goal, what is there to look forward to? We are like a ship at sea without a destination, just going in circles not really sure why.

This is a recurring trend in my posts and that is for a reason, clear defined goals are the basis for any forward motion, otherwise you don't know which direction you're going in. But the desire to change course must come from within & be strong enough to overcome the inertia that is present all too often in our lives. We only go around once in this world (unless you believe in reincarnation), so make it count!

Technology & Personal Branding

For those of you out there who own a business or are just looking to creating a name for yourself, you probably know by now there are very few more effective ways to do it these days than via the INTERNET. The web is no doubt a presence that has changed the way people communicate and do business forever. But what does this mean for YOU?

It could mean A LOT - if you use it properly. There are millions of dollars being made every single month over the internet. These people are not necessarily any more intelligent, educated, motivated, etc. than YOU are, they are just more resourceful and have a stronger personal brand.

One great way to brand yourself is via social networking websites such as Facebook or Twitter. When you've got a strong image, people will know what to expect when they visit your page, get a certain "vibe" from it, and you will better be able to attract the proper friends or customers towards you or your business. The right pictures, quotes, status updates, links, etc., can make a world of difference in driving traffic to YOU.

This is very important and there are multiple facets to it. Firstly, what are you trying to portray to the world? I'm not talking about who you are, where you came from, what your education is, how much money you have...I'm talking about what do you WANT people to see you as? The internet can literally make or break you. People have been made famous overnight thanks to YouTube - memorable, unique people with strong personal brands. If you want to attract potential business partners, don't have a profile picture taken with a disposable camera of you chugging a beer...duh. Grab a digital camera (or borrow from a friend...if you can't do that, borrow some new friends...), and put a nice collared shirt on or a suit, and get some creative pics on your profile. Your facebook page is your first impression to the world, you WILL be judged and perceived according to what you put on it. Sorry to be blunt, but it's just the way it is. And STOP with the negative statuses! If you are looking to attract positive, successful people to your life, they don't want to be bothered by people who are constantly complaining about menial things that happen in their life...everyone has problems, never let'em see you sweat.

Positive, inspiring quotes, being entertaining (hell, copy/paste from your favorite comedian if you're not funny) will keep people coming back to your page to see what you've got to say next. If you're negative and complain, well...they won't.

Another awesome way to brand yourself is via a small (or big) personal web page that defines YOU. This can be had for cheap, if not FREE. My personal favorite site to use is HostGator.com (where I host LimitlessLifestyle.com, you can register for hosting here: http://secure.hostgator.com/~affiliat/cgi-bin/affiliates/clickthru.cgi?id=Hollywood1985) Hosting your page costs nearly nothing (hosting starts at $4.95 per month to keep it live online), they are professional & efficient, and it gives you a BIG web presence with SMALL effort and cost. Remember, you can be anyone you want on the internet, and your personal brand is going to be the end result of what you put out there on the web. The choice is yours.

ONE WORD to change your life

You wanna know ONE SINGLE word that can change your entire life? I'm talking about a single, solitary, lonely little 4 letter word that can be added to your daily vocabulary that can result in one massive shift in your reality and accomplishments. Sound like a word you want to know? Read on my friends...

We all go through our lives living a bunch of "shoulds". I should workout...I should eat better...I should do something to make more money...I should leave my crappy boyfriend/girlfriend - then what? we DON'T. "shoulds" are one of the biggest anchors to our personal progress in this world.

What can we do to change this negativity? It will only come from INSIDE of each and every one of us, in the form of raising our standards and demands for ourselves. There's one simple shift that needs to be made. Turn every SHOULD into a MUST. What if you DID workout more? DID eat better, DID make more money, DID get out of a bad relationship, how much of a POSITIVE IMPACT would this have on your life? Why do we live our lives according to what we SHOULD do and then DON'T, instead of what we MUST do and therefore WILL?!

The lack of satisfaction in each of our lives comes from within. We are not willing or driven enough to perform each and every should as a MUST, which is what it's going to take to really change our lives and our world for the better. Nobody can tell you what a MUST is for YOU except yourself. Be honest and define these things within your heart, and then...only then...will you begin to change & achieve more fulfillment in your life.

Modernvation & goals.

In life, people tend to wait for the good people to come to them, and in waiting, they miss out. Usually what you wish for doesn't fall in your lap; it falls somewhere nearby, and you have to recognize it, stand up, and put in the the time and work it takes to get it.
This isn't because the universe is cruel...It's because the universe is smart.

i think it's important for everyone to realize: nothing anyone ever says will change your life. you can read, watch, listen, etc. to whatever you want, and NOTHING will change. why? information is useless without EMOTION, and emotion is useless without ACTION. external motivation is temporary, the drive from INSIDE is what will always keep you going. find yours & never let go of it, it is your key to success in life.

what are the driving forces that will get you up and moving towards your goal and what you see the universe put in front of you? or even that will keep your eyes open wide enough to notice it. the truth is like I said, external factors won't be strong enough to keep pulling you in the right direction - another important distinction to make. PUSH vs. PULL. You've got to CLEARLY DEFINE your goals, write them down, have a physical manifestation of what you want to accomplish. Surround yourself with text, images, people, etc who are, and have what you want.

Here's the hard part...what do YOU want? It's not just about a 6 or 7 figure salary, or a fat bank account. Green paper is worthless. It's what it allows you to do. Do you want to start a charity? Put your kids through college with cash? Take two 6 month vacations a year? Or maybe you just want stuff like a watch that costs more than the house you grew up in. The bottom line is that you can never let other people define your passions. If you do, what you want out of your life won't create a strong enough desire to pull you towards it. Be clear about your goals, put a date on them, even if it's unrealistic. Just get it down on paper, really BELIEVE it, and watch how the doors of the universe start to open in your favor. Until then, just remember that a life without a defined goal or plan, is like a ship out at sea without a destination. Where are YOU really going?

get UP

you wana know why people never feel excited about anything anymore? MOTION CREATES EMOTION! we grow up in a culture of "don't talk in class", don't do this, don't do that - are kids jumping around because they're excited? or excited because they're jumping around?! your physiology changes the emotions your body feels, we need to GET EXCITED again, no wonder everyone is miserable, GET UP!

I mean think about it, most people out there work conventional jobs, this probably means a nice little commute SITTING in traffic in the morning, 6-8 hours SITTING at work, SITTING again driving home or taking the train, and then what? Your energy has been flatlining all day that by the time you get home you don't wanna do sh!t except sit on the couch and melt your brain in front of the TV. Here's the kicker - people do it EVERY DAY! When the weekend comes around, what do you wanna do? RELAX?! Your brain might feel fried after your long week and your body probably is too because you've had zero adrenaline flowing through it for 5 days, so now you want to sit around saturday and sunday which just makes things WORSE until you get up on monday to start the whole routine over again...when does it end?!

It's not a coincidence that people who exercise regularly are generally happier than those who don't. Not to mention they LOOK better which will also increase confidence which increases your energy levels & motivation. If you look better in your suit or skirt, you're more likely to OWN wherever you are with a smile and determination.

It's more than just exercise though, it's creating a lifestyle around activities that won't beat you down every day of your life. Don't like your job? QUIT or FIND SOMETHING ELSE that will bring in money on the side until you're making enough to fire your boss. It's time for this country to get off their a$$es and DO something! There's too much placidity and apathy out there, and it's a snowball effect so it's just getting worse.

If you're sitting behind your desk reading this and you feel like crap, now you know why. SMILE...seriously, just sit there and smile like you would if you watched someone slap your ex across the face. Physiologically (is that even a word?) you will feel better because your body tells your brain how to feel, even moreso than your brain telling your body. Your actual physical biochemistry changes according to how you move your body and express yourself! That means if you ACT OR LOOK like you are HAPPY...guess what? Your brain is gonna go "hehe im happaayyy", it's not a coincidence. So fake it if you have to, you will still feel better and it will be contagious to the people around you. Get UP and do something, you'll thank me later!

your FOCUS will steer you

Ever wonder how people can be driving on a country road with like, ONE telephone pole for miles and end up CRASHING into it? HOW do they manage that? it's because just like in life, you move towards what you focus on - just like driving or racing a car, you need to focus on where you WANT to go, not where you DON'T want to go. Your mind will steer you in the direction of your goals.

How many times do we all have something bad happen to us, and we FOCUS on it like crazy, right? the old saying goes "when one door closes, another opens - but we stare so long at the closed door we don't see the new one open". How true though. We're all guilty of it, but it's straight self sabotage!

If everyone reading this was aware of how powerful your thoughts & focus are, I'm confident you'd never have another negative thought again. Your mind will steer you where you need to go - the challenge is having the CONSTANT fortitude to avoid and not get stuck on negative thoughts or situations. Positivity and passion are the fuel of progress and you always need to keep your tank full.

There's too much negative we all come in contact with on a daily basis, people are miserable and it's socially acceptable. If you're happy for no reason it's "weird". The news is all bad stuff, when was the last time something positive was reported? Commercials and jingles have us hooked, and there are other little influences that we don't even think about which I'll get into on a later post. We need to ALWAYS be feeding our mind with POSITIVE and shut the rest of this out. Keep the sheep close so the wolves don't get'em. The team wins the game but we all have to be on the same page. I HIGHLY recommend listening to amazing speakers such as Anthony Robbins, Jim Rohn, Robert Kiyosaki, whoever fits your personal style the best. Always be putting positive in, and you'll get positive out.